Wednesday, September 22, 2010

Mystery of Lake Consequence

I don't even know how to start this one...

I guess I'll start at the beginning. A couple of weeks ago I moved our Wii into the bedroom so that we could take advantage of the Netflix streaming that is included in the account. I have to recommend using the Wii to stream Netflix if you have them. I find the quality is good and Netflix is adding new titles to stream all the time. Won't be too long til streaming makes DVD's as relevant as records, 8 tracks, and VHS. One of the best things about using Netflix streaming is that Robby can watch kids stuff and I don't have to hear the same videos over and over and over and over again. There are quite a few titles for children to choose from, so it really is a sanity saver.

Anyway, I also have been using the new Netflix app on my iPhone. Again I am really surprised at how well Netflix has made this product. Only drawback that I have found is that you have to have a decent connection for decent streaming. I've been using this quite a bit at work when the rest of the shift is watching something that I don't care for. Works awesome!

There is another instrument in this story and that is the iPad. One of the firefighters on my shift has an iPad and we signed in my account onto it to see how well the iPad app worked, just like everything else...great. Well he didn't ever sign my account out and has just been able to watch shows on it using my account.

So now this is where it is going to get complicated.

I was at work and was using my iPhone Netflix app when I noticed a title in the recently watched section that I didn't recognize. Apparently Lake Consequence is a story of a "repressed housewife that develops an erotic infatuation with a local landscaper in a soft-core sensual drama that will get your blood pumping." That is directly from the description on the site. Naturally I assumed that my firefighter was in his room enjoying some skinamax on my (and my wife's) Netflix account.

Now I don't want to jump to conclusions or anything. So I share what I have just discovered with my engineer to see if my theory makes sense to him. Of course it did. Both of us now think that our firefighter is a fan of the skin flick. Being firefighters, and sensitive to each others feelings we made every attempt to delicately approach the subject...like a grenade thrown into a commercial chicken coup. It got messy. Accusations were stated, gestures were made, and denials were steadfast. Of course the firefighter is going to deny watching porn at work, nothing good can come from that. He was really adamant that he didn't do it though.

That means my wife!!!!

When I go to work and am putting my life on the line she is at home watching this trash and wanting some ripped, sweaty, exotic lawn jockey.

Wait, that can't be right. I know that my wife loves me and would never cheat on me. She would never do anything like that.

I still accused her of it though. As soon as I got home I asked what the hell she was watching when I was at work. Why did she need to get her kicks from some soft core garbage? Was I not man enough for her?

She denied it all also. So what is going on? I have my own little mystery going on at my house. I wish I was a better detective, cause I am out of leads and have no idea how to get anymore clues to this mystery.

Over the next four days I kept busy and eventually mostly forgot about the Lake Consequence Mystery. Until this afternoon. My wife came into work and tells me that another similar type movie is on the recently watched list at home. WTF!?!?! Now I look like the perv!!

Then my mind flashes to the day before when Dani and I were talking in our room and Robby had grabbed the Wii remote and was cruising through the Netflix just pushing buttons to turn it on and off. Flipping through all the available titles randomly and starting a few here and there. So the perv is my 21 month old. He is the one that was flipping through with the controller, just like he sees Mama and Dada, and turning on the soft core late night titles.
He might look innocent, but this is where he could end up.

I really hope that this isn't a sign of things to come.

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