It's a Girl? maybe

This morning my wife started her 10th week of this second pregnancy, and according to the directions on the box of Boy or Girl? test we were ready to find out what we were really expecting. This is great for us because we are not patient people. (And if you have kept up my MIL is driving people crazy with "What do you think they are having? talk.)

Now I don't know how accurate this test is yet, but my wife saw it profiled on an episode of The Doctors so I'm guessing there is some science to it. Apparently it can analyze my wife's urine (pee-pee, piddle, tinkle, whatever you call it) and turns color according to if your having a boy or a girl.

First thing this morning she jumped up and locked herself in the bathroom. I really wasn't all that awake until she yelled "What time is it?" so that she would know when the 10 minutes were up. I set the timer on my iphone and the suspense began to build. I have really thought the entire time that we were having a girl. Not a doubt in my mind, until she asked me what time it was. Dani has always said that she needed a girl, kinda one of those complete you life things. And to be fair I have always thought that she would need a daughter also. Her family is very close knit and all the mothers and daughters have an incredible bond. But if this test came out boy, then I was probably looking at going through all this pregnancy mess again (Dani if your reading this, I know you have it WAY worse than I do, but I hope you get my point.) If this test says little girl, then it would be a choice to go for a third, not an absolute certainty.

I know it's not the best pic, but it was really early and I was excited!

As my phone started to marimba Dani ran to the test. She thought that it said girl, but wanted to know what I thought. I was thinking great! We bought this test and it is going to be undetermined, what a crock!! When I looked down what I saw was orangish fluid, which when compared to the label was a clear indication that I am going to have a daughter.

I didn't know what to feel. I was excited, happy, relieved and nervous. Then came the realization that I might become a crazy paranoid with a little girl. I am probably going to be the overprotective nosy dictator dad that you see on all those cheesy chick flicks, you know the one that gets screamed all sorts of horrible things by the daughter. That is going to kill me.

So please wish me luck through the rest of this journey and in another six weeks or so we will go get an ultrasound to confirm with this test. Who knows, maybe this is all hogwash and I have a little boy brewing away in there. God he'll be mad when he finds out he was supposed to be a girl now.

In MIL news, all this does is change "So what do you think their having?" to "What do you think they should name her?" I swear she is completely uncontrollable. Anyone know of any good loony bins, madhouse, sanatoriums, or mental hospitals for her?

Monster-in-law and that question?

All married men have one of them. No matter what you do they lurk around, searching for a reason. A reason to invade and assault our children. I speak of the Mother-in-law. Those invading, instrusive, incessant monsters that trick you into thinking they are normal people right up until you slip a ring on their daughter's finger and they metamorphasize into baby hungry junkies fiending for a hit. And mine is their Queen.

Funny thing though? You give them what they ask for, and it only exacerbates the problem. They want more, more, more. "Two isn't enough. You guys need at least three." "Don't I make the cutest grandchildren?", and the focus of this "Do you think it's a boy or a girl?"

Unlike most couples that have a choice in whether they find out the sex of their baby during the pregnancy I don't. I would have to take my Monster-in-law out. As in whacked. Swimming with the fishes. She can't help herself. I truly think that she obsesses over what our baby is going to be. I walked in on her the other day with my wife laid out on the couch twirling a string over her belly. According to her you can tell the sex by the way the string turns. She also wants us to find some water witching wands that can tell if it's a boy or a girl. She consults the Chinese birthing calendar daily in attempts to ensure that it is what she thinks it is. OBSESSED, I tell you.

And look out if you cross her path during a grandchild's pregnancy because she is going to make you pick a side, Boy or Girl. If you claim that you don't know she will grab you by the neck, throw you up against the wall and hold you on your tip toe's until you make a choice. I don't really know why she needs everyone to make this decision, but she does.

So in order to make my MIL happy I am going on the record...It's a girl. I have no doubt about this and have found it hard to think of boy names in the week that we've known. A few weeks from now I  may be eating my words, but I have a strong inclination that we are having a daughter. Although I am just happy that our family is going to have a new member, boy or girl.

For those of you that may have been offended by my description of my Mother-in-law, you don't know her. Just kidding. She is on board and knows that I am going to be using parts of her personality in this blog. Truth is I do love her and I have one of the greatest MIL anyone could ask for. If she is guilty of anything it would be loving her grandchildren too much. That part of her being obsessed is all true, her reason for living really is those three (soon to be four) munchkins.